I search the Web for K-Fed quotes so you don't have to. You're welcome.

I usually reserve my judgment until I hear something, but just by looking at the guy, reading past interviews, and reading this story, I can honestly say we're lucky to be alive right now.

What other generation has such a pop icon as K-Fed? Who else will our children look up to, if not the skinny, white trash hip-hop artist? I know I'm already reconsidering the names I've had picked out all my life for my unborn children; "K-Fed" just has so much more street cred.

Among the gems of the interview, and others:
1. "My album is sure to set the dance floors across the world on fire!"

2. "I don't think we've ever been formally introduced. My name is Kevin Federline. I'm 6 feet tall, have brown hair and brown eyes. I enjoy horseback riding, long walks on the beach and the wind whipping through my hair." (Seriously, it's from his Web site.) Because if I were a pop-star wannabe, I'd want my Web site to sound like a fifth grader wrote it. No offense to any fifth graders.

3. ""I could go on forever about my love for this girl. ... She's (expletive) proud of me. I could be sitting at home doing nothing. I could be playing (expletive) video games." What??! (Really, it's from this article.)

4. "I've been in the closet with it for a while. I don't know, guess I would have to say I'm the rookie of the year." (From this.)

I'm sure there's more, but I can't stand it anymore.