Ha, ha. And you guys have cable.

There must be one very rich, very odd person out there.

VH1 is doing this benefit programming thing, and all the money goes to help people affected by Hurricane Katrina. Pay $25, get one video request. Well, some smart ... guy decided to donate an hour's worth of money to play versions of "99 Luftballons," or "99 Red Balloons." Oh, my. Check it out here.

At least it's for a cause, I guess.

So I was thinking, what song could I listen to for an hour? Or, better yet, what song would I play, if I were so rich as to have an hour's worth of songs to pick from? Um, let's see ... 60 minutes in an hour, divided by three minutes per song ... (insert Erin opening her desktop calendar) = 20 songs (Am I doing this right?), minus like, eight for those songs that go over three minutes.

OK. I have 12 songs. It's harder than you think, because, unlike "99 Red Balloons" guy, I would be thinking about the millions of people who would be sitting there thinking "God, who picked THESE songs?" This is a lot of pressure. You want to appear cool, but not too cool. Not a music snob. Oh, my.

It should be noted that I don't know if videos actually exist, as I haven't seen VH1 or MTV or anything in a decade and a half.

1. "Second Wind," by Billy Joel, because it's hilarious. There's this guy who wants to jump off the bridge, and Billy's all there on the edge like some angel in a trench coat, showing him all the people who would miss him. Very "It's a Wonderful Life." Very funny. I know this one exists, because I have it on DVD. Ha. I am embarrassed.

2. Frou Frou's "Let Go." More commonly known as "the song that's in the background when Natalie Portman and Zach Braff are hugging in the airport at the end of 'Garden State.'" Makes me tear up everytime.

3. "Take on Me," by someone in the '80s. I don't like this song and will turn it anytime it's on the radio, but when I was a kid, I remember thinking "WHOA, how did they do that?" when I saw the characters like, walk through a mirror and turn into chalk-esque drawings on VH1. Very '80s.

4 and 5. I'd waste two votes on "Since U Been Gone," by Kelly Clarkson, to be played consecutively, just to annoy Dave.

6. Something by The Strokes, because I love them and the only video I've seen of theirs is a grainy one from some girl's Myspace page. Very grainy. Very "buffering, please wait."

7. "I Believe In Sympathy," by Bright Eyes. Conor Oberst would hate every second of it, because it'd be on mainstream media ... but I would still love it.

8. "Helena," by My Chemical Romance. I know it's sooo last year. I know they're no longer edgy, but are kinda poppy. But I have the money, and I control the hour on VH1. So there.

9. to 12., I play four other Billy Joel songs, just to round out the hour. And because I've made it through my iTunes and don't feel like going back through the list. Unless anyone has suggestions.

(Photo: Still from "Second Wind" by Billy Joel.)