Because you're DYING to know about our wedding, I just know it.

Because I know you're all DYING to know what the latest wedding plans are, I will tell you. Stop asking, you crazy mob. It should be noted only two people have actually asked me. ...

Anyhow.

1. We got our rings. And mine is gorgeous. Well, OK, we picked them out and get to pick them up from the store Saturday. But it's gorgeous. I considered going to the courthouse to get hitched now just so I could wear it, but I'm not sure how Mom'd like that. I'm guessing not much.

2. T minus four months (almost to the day, thankyouverymuch), and still no sign of invitations.* We were going to make some, but this whole job thing got in the way.
*See also: Erin has no veil, Erin has no shoes, Erin has no cake picked out, Erin has no idea what to do if she's getting married out of state, and Erin has no transportation from the church to the reception (make that Erin and Dave and wedding party, as I'm sure I won't be getting married, then bumming a ride with Grandma while all my friends and Dave chill in some van).

3. I'm starting to care less. I got the big stuff. I'm not so worried anymore. Now, I'm just excited. As in pumped. As in I will probably squeal a bit if someone mentions that -- holy crap -- I'm getting married in four months. Four months to the day TOMORROW. Holy COW.

4. We still don't know what our song is going to be ... We like music too much to just get to pick one. We don't have a "song." We have a never-ending soundtrack. Whoa. That's deep. We had picked out an Iron and Wine version of a Postal Service song, but I'm not sure it's not about hating people; and then we thought about a Damien Rice song. Rice's song is all sweet and romantic and "Can't take my eyes off you," and then, right when you're like "THIS IS THE ONE," he goes and whispers "'Til I find someone new" right at the end. Jerk.

Suggestions?

5. Not sure how to handle that whole parents/step-parent thing. Do I dance with just my dad? Can I split the time and dance with my step dad? Why can't I dance with my mom? Come on. Why not?

6. Good news: I've nixed the dollar dance. BO-RING. I've also nixed the hokey pokey, chicken dance and all line dances. There will be no "Electric Slide" played at our wedding. If so, I am grabbing Dave and leaving. THAT'LL teach 'em. Jury's still out on the Cha-Cha Slide, as it's a hit with the under-10 crowd. And me. I have no shame.

7. Best meal ever: Mashed potatoes, beef, pork, rolls, corn, noodles. No one outside of Putnam County would understand just what that means. It means Putnam County (Ohio) wedding food. It means no scary chicken-like blob on your plate. It means no crazy "mashed potatoes with parsley and (whatever else you may want in it)." It means when Dave and I leave, we'll have Ziploc baggies filled with noodles that we can take home and freeze and live off for at least a year. BEST WEDDING EVER.

8. Honeymoon: Set. Quebec. Yesss.

9. Hair: My soon-to-be sister in law's doing it for me. Yesss.

10. Bachelorette party: Really?

And there you have it. And that's how Erin and Dave got married.

The end.

(Photo: It says "Jewelry may be enlarged to show detail." No kidding? Dang. And I thought I'd be walking around with a ring the size of my fist. DANG.)