You're so ... you're so ...

"Does my face look bad?"

"No."

"Does it look good?"

Nods. Slowly, and without eye contact.

"'Cuz I did my makeup a different way."

"You put purple under your eyes."

"No I didn't."

"Yes, you did. Right here (pointing to his under-eye, right by his bottom lashes)."

"No. I didn't."

"It looks --"

"That's a Niese gene. You KNOW that. What, you going to ask me about my dark undereye circles next? It's the Niese genes, I can't help it!"

"What? No, it's purple!"

I don't own purple. I shall stop asking him to look at my face from those point on. Unless I'm trying to shoot him a mean, Drop Dead stare.