I'm a high roller

I got a check in the mail today that I'm considering not even cashing.

Like that check from your roommate in college for their half of the rent that said "for drugs" in the memo line (I totally did that). Or the one from the state of Ohio three years ago for $7 and some odd cents.

This one, folks, was for 32 cents. Thirty-two. That's one quarter, one nickel and two pennies. While it's enough for, say, an ear of corn at the grocery store, it's not going to help me much in the whole Living thing.

Moreover, it gives me pleasure to think of some man squirreled away somewhere in a corporate office building, refreshing his company's online bank statements going "WHERE is that 32 cents? I'm 32 cents too rich! I don't understand! Why doesn't she CASH it??!" while pulling his hair out. That'll show him. Not to mention it cost the company more to mail it than it's worth.

Besides, does it make sense to go to the bank, a place I never visit, to cash a check for 32 cents when it will inevitably end up in my cupholder?

Maybe, though, I'll pull my car through the drive-up window, dramatically place my check into the cup and snap the lid shut, boasting to the teller: "How you doin'? Put that in savings. Yeah. All of it." And then wait for my receipt while playing the cool face. Yeeeaahh.