Get me some snow pants.

This work thing is pretty funny. I mean, it's like, something you just have to do. Every day. Man, when God was passing out silver spoons, I must have been in the bathroom. That's so like me.

And, get this: regular workers don't even have snow days.* ("No way!") Yes. It's true. I listened by the radio for a half hour today, just waiting to hear my workplace's name, but they never said it.**

Snow days were the best when I was in school. My brothers and I would sit by the radio, just waiting: "Ada, Bluffton, Coldwater, COLUMBUS GROVE, Cory Rawson, Delphos, Elida with an 'E,' Kalida with a 'K' ..." Yessssss. That school closing report is permanently stamped in my brain, filed under "happy memories."

We'd go sledding, watch movies all day or talk on Instant Messenger. Sigh. Those were the days.

Then came college. Shffttphst. Yeah. Like I was going to go to class if it were snowing. Or had snowed. Or looked like snow. Or if the sun was shining too brightly off the snow. Riiight. I'd sleep, or watch movies all day or talk on Instant Messenger. Those were the other days.

But, a smart aleck or my stepdad would argue that those days didn't pay the bills. Er, I mean, if I lived like those days now, I wouldn't pay the bills ... uh ... whatever. There's always someone who comes by and snows on my parade.

I suppose the whole world can't come to a stop on account of a little snow. But what if it could? Huh? What. If. I'd have to get me some snow pants.

(*For real.)
(**Not actually true.)