Monday, June 4, 2007

I must preface this post by saying how much I love and adore my mother in law ...

But sometimes, she can be just downright funny. And I'm not even talking about the time she pushed Mr. Big under the water in their back yard pool when he swam to her to climb out. Nope. Not even talking about that moment, which Dave coincidentally caught on video.

I'm talking about the two large boxes of food in my kitchen. The boxes of food I didn't buy.

When my MIL wanted to go through her overstocked pantry, Dave and his sister and her husband and I stood up with varying levels of gusto and grabbed a box to "go shopping." I stood back because, well, it's not my mom's pantry. But I was there to nod that "yes, we need those eight boxes of Jell-o" and shake my head no to the ketchup bottle that was best if used by my high school graduation.

And it's not just just MIL. Everyone has that one cupboard. My mom had it for medicines. Before she got married and we packed to move into our new house, I took a few bottles down from the medicine cabinet. "Expires 08/93." "Best if used by JAN 91." Spray antiseptic for cuts with rust on the bottom of the can and graphics that predated the usage of the word "graphics" like we know it today.

And MIL's collection of past-due items just happened to be food. Lots of it. Yeast packets from 1985. More cans of beans in more varieties than most could've named on "Family Feud."

Dave and his sister kept pulling out bottles and cans, saying "So THIS is why we didn't take vacations! All these groceries ..!" And Dave's dad shook his head at the trash cans by his feet. Just shook his head ... "All these groceries. All this junk."

But see, once the closet was cleaned out and the boxes put in our back seat for the long drive back to Oshkosh ... it hit me.

She didn't rid her life of anything. She just moved it. To our house. Ooh, she's good.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

So, NOW you get it,huh? Somehow, I just knew the whole "pantry thing" would make your blog. Groceries- wow- gives a whole new meaning to 'me casa e su casa'...haha! Doesn't everyone keep 37 cans of kidney beans in their pantry? And, Kosher salt- you never know when you'll run out of it! Not to mention mayonaise- the choices are endless (real mayo, Miracle whip, M. whip lite, Salad Dressing, etc., etc. Some folks (insert the M-I-L here) come from large families and have difficulty cooking for a few. Then there's the whole Y2K issue, and the 'starving people in Africa' view.
NOW her stuff is yours, suckers! Damn, she IS good. Just ask her. Ha, Ha, Ha.
Love ya-
-the M-I-L