Don't mess with me on this one

You guys are not going to believe this, but Samuel L. Jackson just called me.

He told me if I wanted to live, I should go see "Snakes on a Plane."

Amazing. I didn't know he had my number. Or, more accurately, I can't believe my friend KNOWS him, and that he AGREED to talk to me, using my friend's phone. Wow. He must be a high-roller, my friend.

More amazing? The marketing and hype this ridiculous movie's gotten. If I see a spider in my bathroom, I spray it with Raid (or air freshner, if that's all I have on-hand) until it's apologizing for ruining my life. I do not think I'm "Snakes on a Plane" material.

But, I do think I'm going to send someone a phone call from Samuel L. Jackson. (You can too, at the link above.)

"That's right, I'm talking about 'Snakes on a Plane.' I know that sounds crazy, but I don't give a damn. (His word, not mine.) Because 'Snakes on a Plane' MIGHT be the best motion picture ever made! ... Do as I say and you live! You don't wanna mess with me on this one, because I will come after you! You hear me?"

I also shiver when he says my name. "Aaiirr-un."