I have a problem. It's called "Sex and the City."

I got another confession to make. I am addicted to HBO's "Sex and the City" episodes. I am on the last season (on DVDs) and, let me tell you, I don't know what I'm going to do when I'm done. Maybe start all over at season one.

But I have a few issues with the girls from the show. For one, there is no big-shot, high-rolling, selfish-man-turned-nice-guy Mr. Big. And no one should end up with him. Except our hero, Carrie. I'm spending my early adulthood convincing myself Chris Noth (i.e., Mr. Big's real name) is just another actor on a "Law & Order" show. A very good "L & O" at that. I believe it's Criminal Intent. But I could be wrong. (Cue theme music.)

But my real problem is this: I either really stink at being friends, or they're just makin' it all up. For those of you who don't watch the show (now in syndication -- watered-down -- on TBS) (i.e., guys, and my mom): there are four women, all in their 30s, who are (for the most part) single (and fabulous). They live in nice apartments, dress in the latest fashions, and date hot guys. They have successful careers (Carrie goes from being a sex columnist for a weekly newspaper to working at Vogue - I mean, come on). They date around. And they still have time (and money) to go out to breakfast every few days together. And they still go out all the time. And they still call each other all the time. I feel a million miles away from that.

Is it because I'm much younger than that, am engaged and prefer not to go out all the time? Because I've never had a cosmopolitan, their signature drink? Is it because I'm not in New York City? Is it because my idea of a hot date is pizza and a movie (in an apartment with heat - first year EVER)? Or how about because I was schooled in a blue-collar city and treasure every single dollar bill I have? (It's all about the Washingtons, baby.)

Yes.

I just don't call people. I don't know all the dirty details. I don't even ask.

Not that I don't want to. I'm just sayin'.